6 Days Is A LONG Wait!

From the time we found out the initial diagnosis until the time I saw the general surgeon, 6 days had past. What a long wait! I ventured out to Barnes and Noble and got myself a book called "Be A Survivor: Your Guide to Breast Cancer Treatment" by Vladimir Lange, MD. What a great book for people just diagnosis. It lays it all out in layman's terms and was such an easy read, I read it in a day. There are suggested questions on the sides of the pages and real life testimonies of survivors. Little did I know, my sister gave my mom the same book from a friend of hers. So now my parents can be educated on breast cancer treatments and understand what I'm talking about. Erik read it too so we can have educated conversations now.


My friend, Kristen, has graciously started a tshirt campaign. Little did she know how big this was going to get once my facebook friends got word of it. Initially I think it was suppose to be just for the baseball families but when we opened it up to the facebook world, we were getting orders from all over the Midwest too! Avery and Jaelyn are still busy having their competition to see who can sell the most in school. Avery was up to 68 orders last we counted.


My friend, Dawn, gave me a notebook to write all my questions to my doctors in that fits in my purse. I love it! I came up with 25 questions to ask at my appointment.


Erik and I are just going through the motions these last 6 days, at work and at home. Our minds are consumed with all the "what ifs". But I haven't really allowed myself to cry too much. One day, while going over to Megan's, I had to pull over the side of the road and cry. But otherwise I am finding that I'm preoccupied with learning everything I can about my diagnosis that there's no time for tears. I feel I have to be strong for everyone around me because if I'm weak it will scare them. Especially the kids. I don't cry in front of the kids. It's too much for them. So for now, I'm still in denial, shock, disbelief I guess. It seems unreal.


I just need a plan. Something to do so I feel like I'm moving forward instead of staying at a stand still.